We Bought Our First House? WTF?

In 2013, Brett, my husband and I met on Okcupid. Was I expecting to meet a guy online? Hell no, but it happened and we fell in love. People tend to say they love our story. It is pretty unique.

At the time, we did not have stability, which I yearned for it so badly. After almost getting our own apartment together, we had to be adults and accept the fact that we were not making enough money to support ourselves. A few months later, we made the move to Tennessee.

Ahhh..

We were finally out on our own. Reality struck quick when I realized I no longer had my parents right around the corner.  I was crushed, but happy. That happiness only lasted a year because Brett lost his job. 

I watched his brother and sister-in-law purchase their first house. I was crushed, jealous , but happy for them. I was down in the dumps most of the time because I was comparing myself to his siblings. I know I shouldn't have been, but I couldn't help myself. 

A few months before losing his job, he asked for my hand in marriage on our 2-year anniversary. The next few months were spent in Pennsylvania back with his folks in their house and then sharing an apartment. My freedom was gone.

We then watched his parents purchase a brand new house. Again, I was jealous and stuck on the sidelines wondering when we would get the opportunity to buy a house or heck, live in an apartment with just the two of us.

I was sad, and most of the time dwelled on the negative. I spent my engagement working as a barista at a local community college hoping we'd get our own space again.

In March 2017, it happened. 

We moved to Greenville and had our own apartment once again. This time, I was fine with the distance. Was I sick of apartments? Yes, of course, but we had no choice. We took a risk moving here without concrete jobs. I only had a remote position while he had a possible job on the table. 

The apartment ended up being disappointing and we moved to another one down the road.  

Our lease is up in January and I originally said that I was done with apartments and was hoping our next step was a house. I mean, we are 30 and 29 years old and we have yet to find financial stability - until now. 

It's happening.

It's all happening so fast. Did I think it was going to be so soon? Nope, but I'm ready. Thinking back to 5 years ago to now is an incredible transformation. We've learned so much about life, each other, and have done so as a team. We've gone through these hard times together and came out stronger and smarter. 

Life is hard. I mean, sometimes it's down right cruel, but it's knowing how to weather to ups and downs with your significant other that counts. 

Did I think we were ever going to buy a house? Um...... I figured SOMEDAY, but not now. Am I proud? Of course. I'm proud of myself and my husband for having patience. Boy did I have patience though! Watching his family get everything I wanted so badly was a hard pill to swallow. Having to smile, grin and jump or joy while feeling dead inside was a struggle, but I had to do it. I had to wait for our opportunity.

We're next. 

This is it. Is it our final house? Nope. My plan is to be here for a few years then jump ship more toward family. Why? I think we're a tad too far from our family and I want my children to grow up knowing their aunts, uncle and grandparents.

But, we made it.

It certainly has not been easy, but it was definitely worth the wait!

#MillennialMarriage

Being married is hard.

You don't think about how tough it really is - until you tie the knot. One day you love him and then the next day you want to kill him. At the same time, between the hate and love sessions, screaming matches and plenty of arguments, love is beautiful. The fact that you found someone you love with all your heart - despite all their flaws - is simply incredible.

If you factor in student loans, trying to figure out who you are and your career, attempting to get pregnant, learning how to be an adult and possibly buying a house, it can get quite sticky. 

A few months ago, we finally paid off our student loans, and even though that was a huge sigh of relief, I still feel like we're in for more obstacles. Him and I have constantly run into hardships - like so many people our age. It's not easy being this age and even though next year I'll be 30, I still feel like I'm figuring out who I am. It has been a long and grueling process.

On top of that, I feel like I'm dragging my husband along for the ride and that's simply unfair. One day it's "I love this" and then the next day, I change my mind. And, I get his hesitation because I'd feel the same way if the roles were reversed. But, I think I finally figured it out! I feel like I finally hit the nail on the head. 

"I'll see it when I believe it," he says. Again, that's fair to say. Whatever I do effects him and vice versa. We're a team, which is something I forget sometimes. Instead of consulting with him, I usually just do my own thing. It's not like I HAVE to ask for permission, but keeping him in mind is something I don't always remember. 

For instance, I booked a trip back home to surprise my mom for her birthday and one day I casually told him I bought a plane ticket and asked if he could drive me to the airport. In a way I guess it's selfish, but thankfully I have a husband who is easy going. Of course he wants to know where I am and what I'm doing, but it's not like other couples who may need to ask for permission. 

To me, marriage is about two people who love each other learning how to work together and not drive each other crazy! 

In November, we will celebrate our 2nd year of marriage and I still feel like I'm getting to know my husband. I still feel like there is plenty more to come and we'll never stop learning about each other.

In general, I feel like you never stop retaining information. And, life is a journey and some days don't always the way we'd like them to go. 

Being an adult is hard some days and it's not easy getting up in the morning and going to work, but we're now grown-ups and we have responsibilities. We have bills to pay (ew) and we can't always lounge around like we'd like because life is not that simple. We need to put on our big girl panties and go out into the real world.

When it comes to millennials, you already know we're labeled as "lazy" and "entitled," but many of us actually working our butts off to get ahead in life and still get the short end of the straw..

My husband and I are prime examples. We went to college, pushed ourselves and are anything but lazy. And, yet, we're doing the best we can do and it's still not good enough for society. So... if you're a #millennialcouple and you pour your heart and soul into EVERYTHING you do, screw society! Just focus on your marriage and stop caring what everyone else thinks. Marriage is hard enough, so don't overcomplicate it by reading into the millennia labels.

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