A Letter to Myself in 2019

Dear Self:

In 2019, you will be happier because well, you’ll have your own business, which is something you’ve been wanting for so long now. You’ll also earn your certification, which is a huge accomplishment because you truly did not believe in yourself enough to go to school to begin with. You were too scared and used your learning disability as a crutch. But, let’s put the past behind us because we can’t go backwards, instead we’re going to move forward.

In 2018, you bought a house, a FREAKING house, which is amazing! You should be so proud of yourself. You also paid off your student loans, hit your 1-year mark at your job and in Greenville, celebrated your 2-year anniversary with your husband, got the news that you’re going to be an aunt, fought for happiness, flew home to surprise your mom for mother’s day/her birthday, and finally figured out what you want to do with your life. Lastly, you were blessed with another surprise, which I’m sure you’ll disclose within the next few weeks.

All in all, 2018 has treated you and Brett pretty well. His business finally took off and he earned decent money this year. Compared to all the years, 2018 has been the best year for you financially. And, I know you are so ready for 2019. It will be so much better than 2018 with all the blessings that I’m sure you’re looking forward to.

Mainly, I just wanted to say I’m so proud of you. Think about where you started until now. You’ve come a long way and you should be happy of your progress. Peace out 2018!

Don't Punish Yourself For Not Working Out

I tend to workout at least 6 days a week. I usually give myself one rest day to relax and drink some wine, but that's at the end of the week, not at the beginning.

A few hours ago, my husband and I decided to go to this dinner with the doctor event at this Japanese restaurant in town and so, I knew I wouldn't get the chance to workout. And, I accepted it.

Well, it turned out we ran late, so we couldn't go.

While my body was telling me, "okay, now you'll have time to go workout," my mind was telling me to chill, drink some wine and have a slice of cake. It was telling me I deserve it because I survived yet another Monday. Then, I thought, "yeah, why not?" I'll just have to workout every day for the next few days and that's okay. It's alright to treat yourself.

I tend to stick to a schedule during the week and stay away from eating after dinner. I usually allow myself to do that on weekends, but rarely do it during the week. But, today. I'm thinking maybe my body needs it. I just paid off my student loans, so it's like a gift to myself. I should be proud of myself and my accomplishments.

I've always had body issues, but I don't know why. I'm a thin girl with a nice figure, yet I've ALWAYS torn myself to shreds thinking I was fat. It seems I'm a rather mean girl on the inside. My mother has always wondered why I didn't have confidence in my appearance. And, I've wondered the same.

But, not today.

Today I decided to eat cake and drink wine.